Just to let you know
that I know
that this
will not be easy –
for any of us. Not
for you, and you
won’t protect us.
I’m here, in this home
that you don’t really
understand, and yet
you’ve passed on things
I like, so maybe
I underestimate you. Maybe
there is a wildness in you
that you’ve held tight inside,
maybe that wildness
is the thing that will
cling on, that will
have to be
untangled, thread by
painful thread.
I am not blaming you.
Please know that. Even though
ours is a second step,
second hand love, it is still love,
and you are someone I would hold,
but maybe never know,
and maybe they don’t know you, either,
and maybe that’s the thing
that will cling on,
that will have to be
untangled,
thread
by
painful
thread.
I am not blaming you.
I am just looking into
these next months, and
wondering what I’ll
have to do, how it will be,
when that first home
is emptied, becomes
just a set of rooms.
I’m going to sign off now,
reminding you I love you,
for the warmth of you,
and the laughter,
and the home you made,
and I will never blame you.
A letter poem for Bjorn at dVerse.
Whoa. The other isn’t named here, and I think that helps the poem get around blame. What then is the issue? There is nothing more terrifying to the everchild within than abandonment. The adult voice here measures departure from the side of a certainty that it must and will happen. The speaker can’t protect that child, nor really wishes to, and yet is clear about the cost and voices it in terms that child will fully understand. That is adulthood, I think, precious and terrifying as it is: Full hearted. Can we ever truly send such letters? Do we ever stop writing them?
LikeLike
You are such a great reader. This was a more personal piece than I would usually post. I’m exploring some complex emotions, hoping I can explain them to myself, maybe?
LikeLike
This is a stellar poem.. .I love the way it can only mean something for the one who receives it… what has passed has passed, and it feels like acceptance of bridges that will never be mended (in full acceptance). I feel like eavesdropping…
LikeLike
Thank you, Bjorn. This was a very personal piece for me – much more personal than I would usually post.
LikeLike
To the you, from the you (ourselves in perspective, but different time frame) is what I make of this. There is still love and care but so much things have passed on that maybe its too late.
LikeLike
Thank you, Grace. I’m trying to work a few things out.
LikeLike
So many mysteries here, but there are mysteries in the ending or changing of any relationship. A very thought-provoking poem.
LikeLike
You do seem to be grappling with. . .something. It is thought-provoking.
LikeLike
I hope the writing of this poem helped in the process of sorting things out. Writing has a way of doing that. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
The mystery of this letter makes it that much more poignant.
LikeLike
It’s a personal poem – one I hope you find answers to!
LikeLike